


Why Carlos isnt allowed to have pizza

by Shipping_all_the_things



Series: Say goodbye to radio! [1]
Category: Welcome to Night Vale
Genre: Cecil Is Not Described, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Prompt Fic, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-28
Updated: 2015-12-28
Packaged: 2018-05-09 21:51:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 917
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5556785
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shipping_all_the_things/pseuds/Shipping_all_the_things
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>...and other things that happen when Cecil and Kevin are anything BUT radio hosts</p>
            </blockquote>





	Why Carlos isnt allowed to have pizza

**Author's Note:**

> So i found this on the internet a while back, 
> 
> "my mom ordered two diffrent pizzas from two diffrent places cause she had coupons and they both got here at the same time so we had a pizza hut delivery guy and a dominos delivery guy both standing outside our front door and the dominos guy looks at the pizza hut guy and proceeds to sing Why Cant We Be Friends? while the pizza hut guy just glares at him."
> 
> and i thought it was perfect so now this exists. yeah...

As a scientist Carlos had many responsibilities. Most of them had to do with, well, science (duh). But there were a few things that night vales resident scientist had to do simply as a result of being human. Things like sleeping, showering, and eating every once in a while so he wasn’t found lying dead in his lab, test tube in hand, from starvation. So here he was sitting on his sofa at only god knows how early in the morning drying his hair and trying to pick a place to order pizza from. On one side of the living room table was a sticky note with the number for pizza hut, the price for a large pizza, and a detailed list about why pizza hut was obviously the best option. Courtesy of their only delivery man, Cecil Palmer. On the other side of the table lay a page long note listing the number for domino's, the price for a large pizza before going into a half page long overly cheery rant explaining why every other pizzeria in town should simply join into the domino's chain and give everyone the pizza they deserve. Handed over to him by the only delivery man for night vales domino's branch, Kevin. “Just Kevin” he had said as Carlos invited him inside to share the pizza that he had ordered just around midnight a couple weeks ago. The scientist had found that in a town as small as night vale it didn’t really hurt to invite a stranger inside. When he had first met Cecil it was over a large pizza from pizza hut and a shared interest in avoiding having to sit alone pretending to like their respective jobs for as long as possible. Now it was something of a tradition that Kevin had been happy to join. Cecil wasn’t as enthusiastic to hear that Carlos was even aware of Kevin’s existence, though. Carlos was putting away his towel, still undecided, when he had an idea. He just hoped Cecil wouldn’t be to upset over this...

“Why hello there Cecil! I didn’t expect to see you here but I must say I’m glad that I did.”  
Cecil had been standing outside of the door to Carlos’s home for five minutes and had starting to get worried. But as Kevin walked up the concrete path past the pizza hut issued bicycle, Cecil decided that he wasn’t all that concerned for the scientist’s well-being. No, as Cecil stood next to Kevin, a large pizza in each of their hands he wasn’t worried because he was a bit too busy planning where to hide the body. It was so early in the morning that he honestly didn’t care whose body it was.  
“Hello Kevin.”  
“It is quite odd that Carlos would order two pizzas from two different places at twelve am but who am I to complain? After all it’s always nice to be given the chance to talk to a friend.”  
If Carlos didn’t come open this door right now the thorn at his side would find out just how little of a friend the delivery man considered him to be. What was with him anyway? Maybe if Cecil just gave the pizza to Kevin and told him to wait for someone to open the door he would. “You seem to be very intent to stare at dear Carlos’s door. Where is he anyway?”  
Just out of a need for Cecil to view the smiling man as a friend.  
“You know, this reminds me of that episode of glee I saw last night. Maybe we could reenact it”  
The pizza only cost 15 dollars they could just take it out of his paycheck. Wait what did he just say?  
“Wait Kevin I don’t think you need to do this.”  
“Why can't we be friends? Why can't we be friends? Why can't we be friends?-“  
“Kevin please stop-“  
“-Why can't we be friends?!-”  
“Besides it’s too early in the morning for this. Kevin? Are you even listing to me?”  
“-I see you around for a long long time, ya! I really remembered you when you drink my wine.”  
“You’re not even listing to me.”  
“Why can't we be friends? Why can't we be friends?” that’s it. Cecil was done.  
“I’m just going to leave this here and. Kevin? Kevin what are you doing?!”  
“Sing with me Cecil!”  
Cecil was on the verge of tackling the singing domino's man when he turned to see the door open. Carlos was leaning against the doorway laughing so hard that both Kevin and Cecil could see tears in his eyes. He looked up towards Kevin, hopefully to tell him off. Cecil was almost happy to see him, then he saw the camera in his hands. And then Carlos started to sing.  
“Carlos The Scientist I swear to god…”  
“I seen you walkin' down in Chinatown.-”  
“Sing it Carlos!” “You’re both dead to me.”  
“-I called you but you could not look around.” Kevin and Carlos appeared to share a moment as Cecil tried to back away from whatever this situation had become. Tried being the key word since Kevin was still hugging him to death. Before they both began to sing.  
“Why can’t we be friends? Why can’t we be friends? Why can’t we be friends?”  
“Carlos you’re definitely dead to me. And you were already dead to me so if you both could please stop hugging me.”

Why did these things always happen to him anyway?


End file.
